AW July Blog Chain: The Worst Opening for A Story


This month’s writing prompt: the Mini Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest

The Mini Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest means trying to write the worst possible first line of a book or story in the spirit of Edward “It was a dark and stormy night…” Bulwer-Lytton. “Worst” in this case is subjective, but florid and ridiculous purple prose is probably closest to the spirit of the thing.

I’ve decided to have a crack at this just for the hell of it.

Here we go…

Rubbing her sleep crusted eyes, Anya slowly lifts herself out from underneath the thick, pink, downy blanket that is so comfortable, she cannot resist its warmth. Yet, she knows she must be at work in under two hours, so she must force herself to leave the comfort of her bed for the next twenty-three hours.

By now I’m hoping that you have the urge to scratch your eyeballs out.

And NO. If you think that I’m going to start the sequal to ‘To be Maria’ with this sentence, you are seriously misguided my friend…:-)

I invite you to read what all the other participants have or have not yet written.

orion_mk3
AuburnAssassin
dolores haze
Horseflye
xcomplex
Proach (ME)
BigWords
jkellerford
Ralph Pines
Euclid
Diana Rajchel
pezie
Guardian
egoodlett
Alpha Echo

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6 thoughts on “AW July Blog Chain: The Worst Opening for A Story

  1. Technically that's two sentences. I'm afraid we must now disqualify you with a lifetime ban from all future blog chains 🙂

    Just kidding, of course, but I'll take a whack at merging them into an uber-sentence with a friendly em-dash:

    “Rubbing her sleep crusted eyes, Anya slowly lifts herself out from underneath the thick, pink, downy blanket that is so comfortable she cannot resist its warmth—yet, she knows she must be at work in under two hours, so she must force herself to leave the comfort of her bed for the next twenty-three hours.”

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